It was funny, wasn’t it? How even those who chose the Light, fought for it until the worlds’ ends and beyond, still craved the darkness for their rest. Such sensitive times, where the tiniest sliver of their beloved light could disturb their peace. They welcome in the darkness, letting shadows pool and cover every surface, at their most unguarded times.

In loneliness, so unlike the way they would band together and cling to each other during the daylight, as if never being more than two steps away from one another could undo the years of pain and suffering they had lived through. Maybe this time, when an idiot comes around yelling about how friends are power, they’ll actually listen and use that information, instead of letting another bastard like Xehanort tear them apart, exposing them for the weaklings they were- still are.

So you’d think they’d spend the nights together, but no, they would all retreat to their individual rooms, as they had so long ago, and as if nothing ever happened, surrendering themselves to the solitude, and the darkness. Ignorant to the way the shadows would curl at their forms, so easy to imagine a Heartless rising from its hiding place, ready to attack-

“Vanitas.”

-and tear out their pathetic throats, especially Ventus, what better ending for the sleepyhead than to die in his sleep-

“Vanitas, please, I’m trying to sleep.”

There’s nothing keeping Ventus from sleeping, really. Unlike when he was so easily riled up by provocations, by the merest suggestion his beloved Terra, he’d gotten far too good at ignoring me in recent times-

“Because most things you say are insults, aimed at my friends!”

-and they deserve every one of them. Anyway. Where was I going with this again?

“You were fantasizing about us being mauled by the Heartless in our sleep.”

Ventus futilely pressed a pillow against his head in an effort to block my voice as he said that. But yes, the defencelessness of slumber, that Ventus and Aqua should really know better about, considering the hellscape she created to keep his empty husk safe while she looked for what remained of our broken mess of a heart, and all that.

“Vanitas. You are literally talking from inside my heart. I can’t tune you out, and I need to be
up early tomorrow. Please shut up.”

Honestly, Ventus, you were asleep for over a decade, one little night of missing your beauty sleep won’t hurt you.

“That was your fault!”

You chose to smash our heart into pieces-

“-because you were going to kill everyone!”

And that means Xehanort, too! I’d have gotten rid of that damned old man there and then if you let me have the ꭓ-blade, and wouldn’t everyone be much happier, then? Well, you got your little happy ending, so I guess everything’s all fine and dandy, huh?

“… Okay, you’re clearly just saying whatever to be upsetting now, because you know what happened to Sora.”

… Honestly, no, not really. Nobody ever bothered explaining to me what the Power of Awakening was, or how he was the only one to face any consequences for using it. And you never bothered to ask those questions, either, just moving straight onto questionable experiments on that redhead princess by putting her to sleep, because that always solves problems.

“… Why didn’t you just ask me? Or, ask someone yourself? I’m not sure anyone else can hear
you in this state, but you could try!”

Because if Aqua found out I was alive, she’d murder me.

“… Fair. Probably.”

See? So any gaps in my knowledge are your fault. Like always.

There’s a moment of silent hesitation, as Ventus finally realizes I’m going to keep talking all night long, and that trying to ignore me isn’t worth the effort. It’s almost sad, as he peeks around his old room, remade as if it had been ten minutes, not over ten years, he’d been gone. He knows where everything is, and yet, he keeps his eyes open, as if he’ll find my form in some corner of the room if he looks hard enough.

“Would that be impossible? I’m not even sure how you’re back, much less if you can

materialize, or something.”

Like I’d still be here, stuck and bored while you sleep the night away and I have nothing to look at but the inside of your eyelids, if I could be anywhere else. No, our heart was shattered, but nobody ever bothered to separate the pieces again, nice and neat like Xehanort had done. You healed, and the bits that were ‘me’ were muddled up in the middle, and would probably be there forever, if you didn’t run into the ‘me’ from Before that got summoned to fight in the Keyblade War.

The heart remembers. In this case, it remembered I had to be me, and not you.

“… You must be really bored if you’re talking to me normally, like this.”

Finally got the obvious, did you? I literally exist on the inside of your thick skull, and yet the information stubbornly remains outside. Now that Ventus finally reached the same page, he’s sitting up to toss open his curtains, resting his elbows on the window and staring out at the sparkling sky above.

It’s always been a thing. Stars and stories and promises of adventure, surrounded by loving friends. Something more stubbornly stuck in this heart than me.

“Hey, how many of these worlds do you think we’ve been to? Probably a lot.”

I’ve definitely been to more, though.

“We’re not counting time-travelled you here.”

Still me. Once the Unversed are free to roam, they could use the negative emotions of others around them to make more of their kind, and spread throughout the worlds. And, since they’re all parts of me, it’s me.

“Oh, come on, those are cheating!”

And yet, I can see your mental tally adding up worlds neither of us have been to, only Sora.

“… I was there! Dreaming, sort of, but I was!”

If you were there, I was there, so that’s no extra points for you regardless.

“Vanitas, you just said you didn’t exist as a person for most of the time I was asleep!

So it definitely counts!”

It most definitely does not. Even the most cursory glance through the memories of those fleeting dreams in his heart shows there’s no substance to any of those worlds. A snapshot, a sound, a half-remembered idea, conversations where you remember the idea of what was said but not a single word.

You can barely make one world from these bits and pieces, much less compare to all the ones Sora must have seen when he was out trying to fix the messes Xehanort kept causing.

But you can still see the stars, shining stubbornly as ever amidst the dark night sky, proving that the brat won in the end, and all those worlds are still there.

“We should visit them.”

What.

“Other worlds! Not just for meeting up with the others, but just…

Visiting them.”

Isn’t doing things like that against your Master’s code, or the keyblade law of not-interfering with stuff? You’ve always been terrible at it, sure, but not wilfully.

…. Oh. Really, Ventus?

“Is it really that surprising I want to spend time with you?”

Away from all your friends.

“We’ve established that someone learning about you would probably lead to Aqua trying to kill you. And you’re not trying to kill me, or anyone, right now! You know so much about me, all I  now is how to put you down in a fight.”

We can always talk more at night, like we’re doing now.

“I still need to sleep! And it’s not… Fair, like this.”

Yeah, there’s an inherent unfairness to our positions. From my space in Ventus’ heart, I can see everything through him, and about him. Every sight, thought, feeling, is right there in my nonexistent face. But Ventus can only rely on words I actually aim at him.

“Wait, you were keeping me up on purpose-”

On the other side, I’m trapped in someone else’s heart, and have no autonomy besides shouting into the void, and Ventus is free to live, bright and radiant and sickeningly endearing as always. Such is the world we live in.

Don’t go thinking stupid things now, Ventus. You wouldn’t want to end up like Sora, would you?

“… It’s too unfair.”

And what’s new about that?

“Would it kill you to shut up and go somewhere nice with me?”

It wouldn’t. It might. Who can even know, with the way we are now? From the very beginning, we weren’t meant to exist. Not like this, broken pieces patched up with shards stolen from other people. Not you, not me, but someone else, someone whole.

“We don’t have to be whoever that was. Let’s just start with you and me, somewhere new.”

New, huh.

“Yeah. Somewhere we can just be us, and talk freely, and not worry about…”

Everything, yeah. Despite coming from you, Ventus, it’s actually a good idea.

(He sighs at my insult, but there’s nothing but fondness overflowing in his chest)